Annoy a petrolhead in one sentence. Go!

". ." (xllx) 10/14/2016 at 15:46 • Filed to: None

2

100

Twingo Tamer - About to descend into project car hell. > . . 10/14/2016 at 15:49

3

“Texting is fine while driving, the people who crash are worse at driving than me” that angered me the most out of anything people have said to me. That wouldnt just annoy petrolheads though i suppose.

Xyl0c41n3 > . . 10/14/2016 at 15:49

2

I don’t know what kind of car it was, just that it was red — and fast.

jimz > . . 10/14/2016 at 15:50

1

“Manual transmissions suck!”

Brian, The Life of > . . 10/14/2016 at 15:50

8

“I’m already going 5mph over the limit so I don’t have to move (my Prius) over (from the left lane).”

Cé hé sin > . . 10/14/2016 at 15:51

4

I adore the new Prius.

Demon-Xanth knows how to operate a street. > . . 10/14/2016 at 15:52

10

Cars really don’t need oil changes anymore.

Brian, The Life of > . . 10/14/2016 at 15:52

5

“Can I borrow your tools?”

. . > Cé hé sin 10/14/2016 at 15:52

0

But it’s so sexy!!!!!!!

. . > Demon-Xanth knows how to operate a street. 10/14/2016 at 15:53

3

Yup. That made me grind my teeth. Good job. Where do I send the dentist bill?

Decay buys too many beaters > . . 10/14/2016 at 15:54

0

*parks minivan right next to you and opens doors all the way to get out*

OPPOsaurus WRX > . . 10/14/2016 at 15:54

3

my cars making a noise, can you fix it?

Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras > jimz 10/14/2016 at 15:55

0

Dam beat me to it

MonkeePuzzle > . . 10/14/2016 at 15:55

8

“I love rolling coal in my heavily cambered stance mobile”

Smallbear wants a modern Syclone, local Maple Leafs spammer > Xyl0c41n3 10/14/2016 at 15:55

0

ARRRRGGGGGGHHHHH I NEED MOOOOAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRR

Rust and Dust - Oppositelock Forever > . . 10/14/2016 at 15:56

1

Picking up a USB wheel/pedal combo for PC/PS3/PS4 last week, the young lady at the counter wanted to make sure I knew the set didn’t include the clutch. It did (3 pedal box), but no shifter, just the paddle shifters, with an option to buy/connect an additional gated shifter later.

Her: “Just wanted to make sure you knew this didn’t have a clutch.”

Me: “You must drive an automatic.” (with a smile, not trying to be a dick)

Store manager at next register begins laughing hysterically.

. . > MonkeePuzzle 10/14/2016 at 15:56

0

That makes me want to see somebody roll coal in an Aixam.

Urambo Tauro > . . 10/14/2016 at 15:56

0

“Why git gud? Cars are just gonna be autonomous soon anyway.”

Cé hé sin > . . 10/14/2016 at 15:57

0

Lovely!

If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent > . . 10/14/2016 at 15:59

5

“It’s just a car...”

ESSSIX GmbH - Accountant/Wagon Thumper > . . 10/14/2016 at 16:01

2

AWD is the best platform.

RallyWrench > . . 10/14/2016 at 16:01

0

What do you mean it’s not Bluetooth?

Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > Brian, The Life of 10/14/2016 at 16:02

4

“Can I borrow your truck?”

Xyl0c41n3 > Brian, The Life of 10/14/2016 at 16:02

2

I may have said that before. I may or may not have been going 90 mph at the time, though. Maybe. I can neither confirm nor deny my rate of speed.

EL_ULY > . . 10/14/2016 at 16:03

7

German cars the most advanced thing in the universe and are engineered to the highest of standards. That’s why they never break.

EL_ULY > . . 10/14/2016 at 16:03

1

it is actually. I think they’ve all been rad

Xyl0c41n3 > . . 10/14/2016 at 16:04

1

I think it was a Beetle.

EL_ULY > Brian, The Life of 10/14/2016 at 16:04

2

oh hell no.... not that sentence >:(

Trevor Slattery, ACTOR > Cé hé sin 10/14/2016 at 16:04

0

Came for Prius shade. Was not let down.

Smallbear wants a modern Syclone, local Maple Leafs spammer > . . 10/14/2016 at 16:05

0

Anything along the lines of “insert misinformation here”.

“If more air is better for the engine, why can’t I just take out the filter?”

Tristan > . . 10/14/2016 at 16:05

5

“Why don’t you just sell all your OLD cars and buy something NICE?”

“Speed kills!”

“Automatics are better for offroading.”

“I drive in traffic, so I NEED an automatic.”

“You have too many cars.” -Wife

“HURRRRR DURRR U NEED A DURACUMSTROKEMAX!!1!”
-Directed at me when pulling my 24' travel trailer with my WJ.

“I used to have a Jeep Laredo!”

Brian, The Life of > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 10/14/2016 at 16:06

2

... and of course your answer is, “If I can have sexytime with your girlfriend,” right? Or do you just go straight to the “AW HELLZ NAW!”

Klaus Schmoll > . . 10/14/2016 at 16:06

0

Oil changes are just a scam from from the automakers and the oil mafia.

Smallbear wants a modern Syclone, local Maple Leafs spammer > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 10/14/2016 at 16:07

1

http://www.ridelust.com/25-awesome-jeremy-clarkson-quotes/

#10

JawzX2, Boost Addict. 1.6t, 2.7tt, 4.2t > . . 10/14/2016 at 16:07

0

“I’m pretty sure thats a Lambo, dude...”

Smallbear wants a modern Syclone, local Maple Leafs spammer > Tristan 10/14/2016 at 16:08

7

I’m no expert, but I’d say the 3rd one is debatable.

Tristan > Smallbear wants a modern Syclone, local Maple Leafs spammer 10/14/2016 at 16:10

3

I’ve wheeled both... I went to great lengths to convert my XJ from AW4 to AX15... No contest, hands-down, manual is always the answer.

Smallbear wants a modern Syclone, local Maple Leafs spammer > Tristan 10/14/2016 at 16:11

1

OK then. I’ll accept it.

Tristan > Smallbear wants a modern Syclone, local Maple Leafs spammer 10/14/2016 at 16:12

0

That was an easy sell. :)

mazda616 > . . 10/14/2016 at 16:13

1

“I can’t wait until cars are zero emission and fully autonomous.”

Shane MacGowan's Teeth > Smallbear wants a modern Syclone, local Maple Leafs spammer 10/14/2016 at 16:13

2

Yeah, there’s a lot to be said for not dealing with a clutch on the trail

BeaterGT > . . 10/14/2016 at 16:13

1

Formula 1, is that like Nascar?

Bluecold > . . 10/14/2016 at 16:13

0

“SUVs are practical”

Smallbear wants a modern Syclone, local Maple Leafs spammer > EL_ULY 10/14/2016 at 16:13

2

That’s less “annoy a petrolhead” and more “get a petrolhead to snort his entire lunch”.

Smallbear wants a modern Syclone, local Maple Leafs spammer > Tristan 10/14/2016 at 16:14

1

Like I said, I’m no expert.

TheJWT > . . 10/14/2016 at 16:17

5

Are (car brand) good cars?

How fast is it?

4muddyfeet - bare knuckle with an EZ30 > . . 10/14/2016 at 16:18

2

“Nice Jeep”

JGrabowMSt > . . 10/14/2016 at 16:19

0

Its just a car.

Smallbear wants a modern Syclone, local Maple Leafs spammer > TheJWT 10/14/2016 at 16:19

1

To which I reply ...go on... and that is the only thing they get until they be more specific.

Actually, I use that on my boss quite a bit. Tells you a bit about him...

. . > 4muddyfeet - bare knuckle with an EZ30 10/14/2016 at 16:23

2

More nice Jeeps:

Saracen > . . 10/14/2016 at 16:27

2

“Sweet car! Can I drive it? I don’t drive stick but I know how to in theory..”

Chan - Mid-engine with cabin fever > . . 10/14/2016 at 16:29

1

“Why do you need 2 cars?”

Mercedes Streeter > Demon-Xanth knows how to operate a street. 10/14/2016 at 16:31

0

Tell that to Tucker. xD

Smallbear wants a modern Syclone, local Maple Leafs spammer > Saracen 10/14/2016 at 16:31

1

To be fair, if nobody let new-to-stick people drive there wouldn’t be anyone learning stick...

TheBloody, Oppositelock lives on in our shitposts. > 4muddyfeet - bare knuckle with an EZ30 10/14/2016 at 16:36

5

jimz > Cé hé sin 10/14/2016 at 16:37

0

its “crease-based” design theme wins hearts and minds.

CobraJoe > Tristan 10/14/2016 at 16:41

1

Why don’t you just sell all your OLD cars and buy something NICE?

For a while, I was considering exactly the opposite: selling my “nice” Legacy GT for a couple of fun DD/projects.

Probably not going to happen while I have kids in car seats though.

PotbellyJoe and 42 others > . . 10/14/2016 at 16:42

1

“I’m a cyclist.”

CobraJoe > . . 10/14/2016 at 16:43

4

camero for sail, new breaks

I know what I got, no low ballers.

CobraJoe > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 10/14/2016 at 16:45

2

That is the lie I tell myself when something bad happens to my car.

It’s far more irritating hearing it from someone else.

Tristan > CobraJoe 10/14/2016 at 16:45

0

I tried the “nice” car with a warranty and monthly payment for a while. I was bored out of my mind.

Saracen > Smallbear wants a modern Syclone, local Maple Leafs spammer 10/14/2016 at 16:46

1

That’s not remotely the same.

There is a difference between offering to teach someone how to drive a stick on your stick shift car..

...and someone who doesn’t know how to drive a stick ASKING you if you will let them drive your stickshift car (even if it isn’t particularly nice, or sporty). It’s highly impolite. I tell them “no”, or I jokingly ask them if they’re going to foot the bill for a new clutch.

Hell, even if they know how to drive a stick, I don’t ever let anyone drive my cars if they ask. Still impolite. It’s up to ME to offer you the chance to drive it.

Dave the car guy , still here > . . 10/14/2016 at 16:46

0

“have you seen how you can port and polish an engine with just a bag of sand?”

disclaimer: do not try this at home....

CobraJoe > Bluecold 10/14/2016 at 16:46

0

Generally, it’s true... they can carry a lot of stuff.

Tristan > Shane MacGowan's Teeth 10/14/2016 at 16:49

0

I wouldn’t say there’s a lot to be said, mostly just that not having a clutch is boring and makes the vehicle less controllable in technical situations... #manuals4lyfeyo

for Michigan > Brian, The Life of 10/14/2016 at 17:00

0

A couple weeks ago, my brother and his buddy were installing a hitch on his Jeep. He comes home and says to me with a straight face, “We broke my friend’s socket trying to remove a bolt, can we borrow your breaker bar and socket set?”

It took every ounce of self control in me to be a good brother and let him walk out the door with those tools.

Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > Brian, The Life of 10/14/2016 at 17:03

0

Honestly my answer is a big laugh and a hearty no.

CobraJoe > Tristan 10/14/2016 at 17:07

1

Same here. My current car is “nice” for an 11 year semi-riced out sedan with no warranty but with a monthly payment (we don’t do well at saving money). I bought it so I wouldn’t make it into a project, but there are so many things I want to fix and modify on it....

CaptDale - is secretly British > . . 10/14/2016 at 17:08

0

“Hey, so you know how to fix cars right? Mine is making X noise. What do you think it is? Can you fix that?”

mr2gud2u > . . 10/14/2016 at 17:11

2

Why would you buy that car, it doesn’t get very good mpg?

Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > EL_ULY 10/14/2016 at 17:17

0

STOP THAT

Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 10/14/2016 at 17:17

0

I think we have a winner. That one could make a grown man cry. After killing whoever told him that.

Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > Xyl0c41n3 10/14/2016 at 17:18

0

That’s kind of funny. Is that a 356?

CobraJoe > ESSSIX GmbH - Accountant/Wagon Thumper 10/14/2016 at 17:22

1

I have been semi-serious in considering how to convert my Legacy to RWD.

TheHondaBro > . . 10/14/2016 at 17:29

0

Oil is supposed to be black and sparkly, right?

DanZman > . . 10/14/2016 at 17:31

2

BUYER: I’d like to look at the Corvettes.

SALESMAN: We have lots of Camaros.

*personal experience

. . > DanZman 10/14/2016 at 17:34

1

Protip:

If in that same situation the salesman says “We have lots of Mustangs” you’ve gone to the wrong dealer.

IanZ - limited-slip indifferential > . . 10/14/2016 at 17:42

0

Automatic transmissions are better than manuals.

And CVTs could be better than both.

HammerheadFistpunch > 4muddyfeet - bare knuckle with an EZ30 10/14/2016 at 17:43

1

Great holy hell yes. I would also accept (as a personal annoyance I get alot)

“So hows the Land Rover?”

theandysho - drives a SHO > . . 10/14/2016 at 17:45

0

“You know cars, can you recommend a car for me?”

I mean, sure. But you’re not going to. So let’s save ourselves a bunch of time and heartache and just pretend this never happened.

Smallbear wants a modern Syclone, local Maple Leafs spammer > Saracen 10/14/2016 at 17:53

0

Or if your kids/siblings/other close relations didn’t ask to drive after getting their permit, period... Not necessarily manual...

Frankly it depends who’s asking. Random dude? F you. Coworker? NO. Friend or relative? Probably. There’s a hard line there. From one, the question is idiotic and irritating. From the other I find it perfectly reasonable.

DynamicWeight > PotbellyJoe and 42 others 10/14/2016 at 17:53

1

I am a cyclist and an automotive enthusiast. Checkmate atheists.

Bigjohn428 > . . 10/14/2016 at 17:59

0

I’m pretty sure that’s a lambo, dude.

DMANbluesfreak > Tristan 10/14/2016 at 18:00

0

I won’t accept it. I’ve wheeled both and when I’m climbing up a 45° rock ledge, I want to know damn well that if I stop part of the way up, I can two-foot it.

Having a doubler certainly does help if wheeling with a manual, but I don’t think I could ever do it. To each their own, though.

If it was a mud truck, I’d go manual 100%. Rock crawling though is too sketchy for me.

DMANbluesfreak > Tristan 10/14/2016 at 18:01

1

As someone who drives a manual car every day in traffic, I personally disagree with #4, because it doesn’t annoy me when others say it. I can see why some wouldn’t want to do it even if I do enjoy it.

PotbellyJoe and 42 others > DynamicWeight 10/14/2016 at 18:02

0

As am I, this is why I know it throws many into purple fits.

Saracen > Smallbear wants a modern Syclone, local Maple Leafs spammer 10/14/2016 at 18:11

1

Family or girlfriend I would let them. Or one of my besties. But most friends will still get denied.

Tapas > . . 10/14/2016 at 18:15

0

“...pretty sure that’s a Lambo....”

Lol what?

The Compromiser > . . 10/14/2016 at 18:18

0

Its just a car.

DanZman > . . 10/14/2016 at 18:24

0

Unfortunately my real problem was the fact that I went to a franchised dealer at all.

I needed up going to a Corvette specialty dealer. I test drove and bought a car at a fair price in 45min.

wiffleballtony > . . 10/14/2016 at 18:32

1

Ban cars.

Fistacufs > . . 10/14/2016 at 19:21

0

1, I only drive to get me from A to B.

2, Whats that third pedal for? (Answer: salvation)

4muddyfeet - bare knuckle with an EZ30 > . . 10/14/2016 at 20:22

0

What’s that last one? It’s right up my street.

4muddyfeet - bare knuckle with an EZ30 > Brian, The Life of 10/14/2016 at 20:24

0

I lend my tools out quite often. As long as I get them back when I ask for them and I don’t have to go out of my way to get them, I have no issue with it.

. . > 4muddyfeet - bare knuckle with an EZ30 10/14/2016 at 20:29

0

It’s a Honker.

They still make them!

http://www.honker.com.pl/index.php/honker-4x4-opis-modelu

4muddyfeet - bare knuckle with an EZ30 > . . 10/14/2016 at 20:58

0

HONKER. I want one...

. . > 4muddyfeet - bare knuckle with an EZ30 10/14/2016 at 21:19

0

From my experience Brits tend to want one based on the name alone. :P

These days they come with really understressed 2.6 115 hp Andoria diesels, before that they used Iveco motors.

They tend to go for about 8000 z for decent 90's models, about 10 to 12 grand for cars around 2003, and I found a 2006 one for 26k, although that sounds overpriced. Most are ex-military.

New ones are about 100 grand.

415s30 W123TSXWaggoIIIIIIo ( •_•))°) > . . 10/14/2016 at 21:24

0

Oh that green Pajero is so much sexy

Bluecold > CobraJoe 10/14/2016 at 21:25

0

well sure they can carry a lot of stuff, but so can a semi truck and those aren’t practical either. Relative to their size, SUVs generally can’t carry a lot of stuff. you need a monovolume for that.

415s30 W123TSXWaggoIIIIIIo ( •_•))°) > . . 10/14/2016 at 21:26

0

- I used to have one of those (looks at my 240Z)

Me - What year was it?

- 1982 I think......

CobraJoe > Bluecold 10/14/2016 at 22:02

0

Semi trucks aren’t practical for far more reasons than just their size.

Relative to their size, they can’t carry much? A Ford Edge is 3in shorter in length and 3in wider than a Fusion. Of course the edge is taller, but it will fit in practically the same parking spot. The Flex is actually slightly smaller in length and width than the Taurus. Both the Edge and Flex have significantly more interior and cargo space than the sedan versions.